Hello Rethinkers (and a very warm welcome to all new subscribers),
I came across a study conducted in Australia that showed nearly half of Gen Z participants feel anxious making or taking a phone call. What’s more, they say a phone call is one of the top three things they want to avoid MOST. It’s a modern-day phobia. I don’t enjoy chatting on the phone and will often hit the auto “can’t talk right now,” however, I definitely don’t dread making a call.
The generation who had the first phone-based childhood fears talking on the phone with people. So what’s going on?
It’s tied to a much deeper social problem: an increasing fear of going out and being with people face-to-face, whether that's work, college or just socialising. It feels safer, less risky, and more comfortable to stay at home.
Retreating is turning into reclusiveness.
I hear it in anecdotes from business leaders who don’t know how to manage people who don’t want to return to the office or join in-person meetings.
I hear it from teachers and professors who have been sounding the alarm loudly about how hard it is to get students back into the classroom.
I hear it from parents who anxiously ask, “is it normal for my kids to not want to go out at all?”
FOMO (fear of missing out) has become FOGO (fear of going out.) A fear of taking risks and engaging with the ‘real-world’.
What the future of FOGO might look like
Japan offers a frightening window into what the future might look like in most developed countries if we don’t deal with the deep withdrawal from society.
In Japan there is a serious phenomenon called ‘hikikomori’ - a term that roughly translated means, “to pull back.” It’s characterized by young adults who live a reclusive life in their parents’ homes, unable to work or go to school for months or even years. Hikikomori is estimated to be affecting 1.4 million people between the ages of 15 -64. In Tokyo, it’s gotten so bad that Mayor Takeshi Saito has launched metaverse socializing events to try and ease the hikikomori back into society after 75% of people living as recluses asked for help to be pulled out of a hermit state. Meanwhile, in South Korea, the government is paying young recluses 650,000 won ($490) per month just to leave their homes.
So how did we get to the point where young people are being offered incentives to leave their house and
re-engage with society?
No, it wasn’t just the pandemic or the shift to working from home. It’s tied to a deeper reluctance to take risks — a lack of self-trust in new situations.
One of the best articles I’ve read on the topic was on
by the incredibly gifted writer, , who has an astute way of explaining issues affecting Gen Z from a Gen Z perspective.Freya writes:
“This feeling of constantly missing out, we’re told, is a major cause of anxiety and depression for Gen Z.
But I don’t believe that’s true anymore.
More often, I see the opposite. Social media doesn’t make Gen Z afraid to miss out; it makes us want to miss out. We want to avoid the risk, the rejection, the awkwardness, the effort and energy that the real world demands. Our major problem isn’t fear of missing out. It’s fear of taking part.”
Read Freya’s piece to find out more about the different ways FOGO is impacting people’s lives and why this is so important to understand. I think you’ll REALLY enjoy this piece:
Next Monday I’ll be sharing a Rethink Research ‘special’ summarising my deep research and insights on the topic of FOGO. It’s a topic that is really important for any teacher, leader or parent to understand.
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Other news:
If you missed it, last week in the Chat we talked about how I developed my definition of trust and I answered a few questions on this important point.
Thanks for your thoughtful comments on last week’s newsletter about why when narrative is sticky, facts don’t matter
I think Gen Z and Boomers suffer FOGO too, especially since the pandemic. Human connection is vital to our health and our humanity. Thanks for writing and researching the topic.
So funny-in a weird way. As a recent retiree I find my self anxious about becoming someone who has “FOGO”. After years of dealing with the politics of work relationships, I find myself retreating to the safety and comfort of my home and new routine. I also hate making phone calls…